SingleDad on Dating: First Break Up, Post Divorce

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SingleDad wants to help you understand Single Parent Dating from a Man’s perspective. How To Date a Divorced Dad is the Q&A Single Parent Dating Advice section on SingleDad. Our question this month comes from a Josh who wants to know how to handle his first breakup after a divorce.

SingleDad on Dating: First Break Up, Post Divorce

SingleDad wants to help you understand Single Parent Dating
from a Man’s perspective. How To Date a Divorced Dad is the Q&A Single
Parent Dating Advice section on SingleDad. Our question this month comes from a Josh who wants to know how to handle his first breakup after a divorce.

SingleDad on Dating: First Break Up, Post Divorce

Dear Ask Single Dad,

My name is Josh, I am 39-year old, Divorced Dad living in
Nashville Tennessee with a 3-year old son. I have been divorced just under a
year and I started dating. I met a gorgeous woman on E Harmony this past summer
and it was a great experience.

She was mid-thirties, no kids and a good head on her
shoulders. I say, "was" because I just got dropped this week and I am feeling
lost. I wasn’t given a clear explanation of the cause of the break up; only
that I was a great guy and the timing wasn’t right for her.

Right now, I wish we had never met. I find myself thinking
of too many mistakes I might have made but no real answers to why she left so
soon. This was my first real relationship after divorce and I was wondering if
you can offer any advice to me and other newly divorced dads who go through
their first break up after divorce.

Signed Bruised, But Not Broken

Dear Bruised, But Not Broken

Back In The Saddle

Getting Back In The Saddle

First of all, good for you for putting yourself out there in
the dating world again after your divorce. It would be really easy to hide in a cave and swear off
dating for the rest of your life.
But you got back in the saddle again and although this first experience didn’t
have a happy ending, your tenacity to move your life forward with a partner
again is to be commended and will eventually be rewarded.

True, her simple answer of it not being the right timing for
her might in fact explain exactly what’s going on. It’s not like the old days when a woman was married with
children by her early 20s. Women
of today don’t have that pressure of settling down at an early age and tend to
keep themselves open for longer than their moms and grandmas did. Especially with the convenience of
online dating, women are exposed to a much wider pool of men then before and
enjoy the experience of dating several men rather than being focused on just
one.

Fingers Crossed

Honesty is the Best
Policy, Or Is It?

However, there could be other reasons she may have decided
to not continue on with you that she may have felt uncomfortable being upfront
about. Of course honesty is always
the best policy, but if a woman senses the vulnerability and sensitivity of a
man’s heart after a divorce, she may choose to spare him of her honest feelings
as way of not hurting his.

Explanations To
Consider

Coming On Too Strong

Coming On Too Strong

After a divorce, a man might be anxious to get back on the
saddle again and fill the emptiness he may be experiencing. As a result, he may be putting out an energy
that might be scaring women off.
Women like a little bit of a chase and if the man is putting out the
vibe that he is ready to slap a ring on her finger and make her his right away,
she could go running from the hills.

She Doesn’t Want the
Family Life

Let’s face it, dating a single parent is a package
deal. It comes with kids. For a woman who doesn’t have any kids,
having the experience of dating a man who does may be more than she is ready to
take on. She may be experimenting
to see if that is a situation she is ready for, but then after having a taste
of it, she may decide it’s not for her.
Plus, she may realize she wants the freedom of having a relationship
with someone who can be more spontaneous instead of having to work with kid
schedules. She may have not wanted
to tell you that because she doesn’t want you to feel bad about having kids.

You Weren’t Compatible

Maybe you simply weren’t
compatible and rather than stringing you along, she felt it best to end dating
each other now rather and free you up to date other women who you might be more
compatible with. If that was the case, she did you a favor.

It’s perfectly human after a breakup to think, think and think some more about what you
could have done differently or more of.
The fact of the matter is, with the wrong person, it doesn’t matter if
you do everything right, if it doesn’t work for the both of you, it just doesn’t
work.

If you are going to spend time thinking, think about all the
things that make you a great guy and use those qualities to attract a woman who
will not only appreciate that in you, but will want to continue to experience
what a great guy you are for years to come.

Are You Dating
a Divorced Dad? Ask SingleDad

SingleDad wants to help you understand Single Parent Dating
from a Man’s perspective. If you are a Single Woman dating a divorced dad and
have a question, or a Divorced Dad seeking dating advice, send us an email
to: dating@SingleDad.com or CLICK HERE and fill
out our form. Your question will be posted to our readers and we will maintain
your privacy.

Richard JaramilloRichard “RJ” Jaramillo, is the Founder of SingleDad.com,
a website and social media resource dedicated to single parenting and specifically for the newly divorced, re-married, widowed and single Father with children.
RJ is self employed, entrepreneur living in San Diego and a father of three children. The mission of SingleDad is to help the community of Single Parents
“Make Life Happen…Again!”