Ask A Lawyer: Vacation Custody & Flexibility

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Get free Family Law Advice from Jeffrey Leving, our Ask A Lawyer, Fathers Rights Expert on SingleDad. This week’s topic is Summertime Custody Schedule and Vacation time flexibility.

Ask A Lawyer Question: Summertime Schedule, Child Custody

My name is Tony and I
live in Philadelphia. I have been divorced for over 4 years now and I have two
children, ages 7 and 10. My post-divorce battles with my ex have subsided
and her and I are getting along fine. I notice this whenever she has a
boyfriend in her life; which makes me happy because I get to see my kids more
often than is stated on my custody schedule.

Question:

I have an upcoming family vacation which requires out of state travel and
more than the allotted 7 days of vacation time on my divorce decree. I have
discussed this with my ex-spouse and she has verbally agreed. She has also
countered with additional dates and times over the summer to spend with our
kids for her vacation. I have verbally agreed. Since we are both agreeable to
this summer’s child custody and vacation schedules. How do I protect myself?
Will a simple email exchange and acknowledgement to each party work? I do not
want the expense of getting lawyers involved, nor do I want to raise an alarm
to my ex-spouse. How does this work?

ALL

Answer: From Jeffrey
Leving

I generally advise my clients that verbal visitation and vacation arrangements,
which vary from the written language, contained in the original divorce decree should
be reduced to writing and incorporated in a court order. The writing should
contain clear and concise terms setting forth your agreement, which hopefully can
be effectively enforced if needed. This should help protect you from being
falsely accused of violating the original court order. Your concern about setting
off an alarm to your ex-spouse suggests that perhaps she might not be in total
agreement with you or she may not be negotiating in a genuine and honest manner.
Although your verbal understanding with your ex-wife makes you reluctant to
incur the expense of hiring a lawyer, I have seen many cases where
misunderstandings as well as misrepresentations concerning these issues have resulted
in avoidable, expensive, and dangerous court proceedings. The acrimony which
arises in these instances often continues and effects areas of the relationship
between the ex spouses which were not at issue previously. For example, if your
ex wife has a change of heart, or even worse, lied to you, about the summer
vacation agreement you could have a problem. If you are not properly protected
by a court order which sets forth your agreed vacation arrangement, you could
return home from your vacation with your children and face a contempt of court
proceeding and be accused of violating the court’s original divorce decree.

Consult with an experienced family law
attorney to review your divorce decree to determine what type of action would
be needed to best implement your verbal agreement and protect you from becoming
a target. If both parties are in agreement on an issue such as this, the
preparation of an agreed order and its entry by the court is usually a
simple matter. Your attorney
should be able to review your divorce decree and relevant statutory authority to
determine how best to accomplish this modification.

Richard JaramilloRichard “RJ” Jaramillo, is the Founder of SingleDad.com,
a website and social media resource dedicated to single parenting and specifically for the newly divorced, re-married, widowed and single Father with children.
RJ is self employed, entrepreneur living in San Diego and a father of three children. The mission of SingleDad is to help the community of Single Parents
“Make Life Happen…Again!”

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Richard “RJ” Jaramillo, is the Founder of SingleDad.com, a website and social media resource dedicated to single parenting and specifically for the newly divorced, re-married, widowed and single Father with children. RJ is self employed, entrepreneur living in San Diego and a father of three children. The mission of SingleDad is to help the community of Single Parents “Make Life Happen…Again!”