Children aren’t perfect, nor will they ever grow up to be perfect, first and foremost. Sometimes we forget this fact and worry about how ours will develop.
Children aren’t perfect, nor will they ever grow up to be perfect, first and foremost. Sometimes we forget this fact and worry about how ours will develop. We need to step back and ask ourselves: Am I worrying about my kids’ future as an outstanding adult for them…or for me?
The big surprise to new dads is that there is no formula for raising champions. The only advice I’ve heard about raising children that’s worth repeating was "Be how you want them to be". Although I already had a daughter when I heard this, I didn’t realize what it meant until my son was born and I started noticing other fathers and sons everywhere I went. I realized how similar most sons are to their dads. You see them everywhere; a father and son with the same haircut, outfit, hat, the same physical appearance and demeanor. I’m not sure if there’s conclusive scientific evidence of whether or not that happens every time, but from personal observation and experience, it looks like the case more often than not. One might say that your children continue looking like you, dressing like you and acting like you through their own adulthood, whether you like it or not.
Practice on your own; the involuntary leadership you instill just by being their parent. See what happens when you’re overly happy first thing in the morning. Watch your kids’ reaction to you acting that way; it will noticeably affect them and change the course of your entire day. The next time you’re feeling stressed out and your children are in the room, watch how they react. You’ll notice they become like you in a moment. Without any serious diagnosis of your parenting skills, you can make a pretty good guess that, the more happy mornings (and entire days) you share with them, the better it is FOR THEM in the long run. Maybe from these mornings they will ‘decide’ to be happy on their own; possibly the best thing you’ll ever teach them. You are more likely to raise an outstanding citizen being positive then worrying, yelling or making them conform to your comfort level. Remember, be how you want them to be.
Richard “RJ” Jaramillo, is the Founder of SingleDad.com,
a website and social media resource dedicated to single parenting and specifically for the newly divorced, re-married, widowed and single Father with children.
RJ is self employed, entrepreneur living in San Diego and a father of three children. The mission of SingleDad is to help the community of Single Parents
“Make Life Happen…Again!”