What’s more difficult and frightening for a child to have their parents break up and then continue fighting anyway? Didn’t you break up to stop the fighting?
What’s more difficult and frightening for a child to have their parents break up and then continue fighting anyway? Didn’t you break up to stop the fighting? In today’s world, it’s already confusing for a kid to be a kid —the last thing they need is a war of the parental units raging about in front of them every time you trade weekends.
You’ve already done the deed, you’ve broken up– now move on! Accept what’s happened as a great lesson from the cosmos, learn what you can from the process and apply it to your new life. When she says something that gets on your nerves, let it go. I know it burns you inside and it’s hard to swallow. Have you ever paused in the middle of an argument and listened to how stupid you sound? Try it next time, even if she’s wrong. Sometimes, the only way to be right in an argument is to stop it.
You were friends, a long time ago, before everything went plummeting downhill, right? Of course you were, you had children together! What was it that you loved about her? Was it her beliefs, the affection and consideration she had for old people, her respect for children, her sarcasm?
Try this: Ask her out for coffee. Not a date. Not to fight. You have coffee with your friends all the time, right? Why not get together with your ex and start talking to her like you do with your friends. Begin a conversation by telling her what you love most about your kids and go from there. It could be the start of a beautiful friendship.
Richard “RJ” Jaramillo, is the Founder of SingleDad.com,
a website and social media resource dedicated to single parenting and specifically for the newly divorced, re-married, widowed and single Father with children.
RJ is self employed, entrepreneur living in San Diego and a father of three children. The mission of SingleDad is to help the community of Single Parents
“Make Life Happen…Again!”