How To Date a Divorced Dad: Confused Jen

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How To Date a Divorced Dad: Confused Jen

SingleDad wants to help you understand Single Parent Dating from a Man’s perspective. How To Date a Divorced Dad is the Q&A Single Parent Dating Advice section on SingleDad. Our topic this month,  viewer asks how to be a stepmom when the child doesn’t tolerate you… Read more.

Hello my name is Jen! I am asking regarding my boyfriend, He has an ex wife that’s had drug issues, mental problems. Now she’s been brain washing and manipulated her daughter that now she wants me gone and out of the house. The mother has always been jealous and has always made sure my boyfriend isn’t happy. Please tell me what can be said because she told her dad she won’t come back until I’m gone . Which we be together about 2 years, since she was 12, she’s currently 14 years old. Please tell me what I can do? 

Seems like you’re In a sticky situation. This is a tricky one because all kids are valid to their own option.  It’s hard to convince her to be okay with you unless you know what her problem is. It could for sure be her mom, but at the end of the day it’s her decision. Its hard for your boyfriend too because he wants both his girlfriend and daughter to get along and be civil. The situation can be addressed and fixed just depending on the problem.

Try to see where she’s coming from

Talk to his daughter try to understand why she feels the way she does. Kids often tend to listen to their moms especially if it’s about their dads new girlfriend. Sometimes kids feel resentment towards who their parents with because someplace deep down they still hope for their parents to get back together.  Its not your fault if this is the case, kids just don’t like to see a broken home sometimes.

It’s sometimes hard for kids to understand that their parents can be in love with someone else other than the other parent. Thats sometimes extremely hard to understand.  Try to bond with her as in go out to eat or go to the park. Its hard for children to even want to give their parents boyfriends/girlfriends any attention because they feel like they are getting less attention due to their love. When it comes to legal issues have your boyfriend contact the court to see what his rights would be in this situation.


At the end of the day communication is going to be your best friend because you might really have no idea what she wants until you just sit down and talk to her! Also explain that being a step mom isn’t easy for you either; you both love her dad.  Love is always going to be a tough thing sometimes fo step parent and child. The love for the parent is always the answer!

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