You Are Not Alone

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It’s been nearly 20 years since my marriage cracked open one sunny, summer afternoon. Devastated and panic stricken at the thought of losing my husband and raising my two young daughters alone, I was not prepared to face this challenge.

It’s been nearly 20 years since my marriage cracked open one sunny, summer afternoon. Devastated and panic stricken at the thought of losing my husband and raising my two young daughters alone, I was not prepared to face this challenge.

Despite my professional training as a psychotherapist and the many clinical hours I spent helping others, it quickly became clear that I would need help navigating this new territory. What I needed, and what I couldn’t find, was someone whose expertise would help me to ride the shock waves of divorce and learn to cope with loss. I also needed to learn to parent on my own as well as interact with my former spouse, whether I liked it or not, for the sake of the children.

Surveying the wreckage of my marriage and my new role as a single mom without the guidance I needed, was terrifying. I spent countless hours researching the literature on loss and single parenting so that I could get a solid grasp of the emotions involved in divorce.

By now you are painfully aware of the lack of resources available to single dads to assist you transition to your new role as an unpartnered person and single parent. No doubt, you have many of the same concerns I had 20 years ago; “Now what do I do?”, “Can I make it on my own?”, “How am I supposed to parent by myself?”

Facing my personal confusion through study and my own professional expertise was my way navigating the muddy waters. I do not recommend that you become your own therapist or undertake clinical training. However, it is precisely because of my personal struggle and professional knowledge that I gained while dealing with it that I am able to share the benefits of my experience with you. I have walked in your shoes and I have developed the strategies to deal with the walk.

My nationwide phone-counseling services have helped hundreds of people build successful lives after their loss through separation, divorce or death of a partner. You can participate in individual or group counseling sessions which are designed to address the unique challenges that single dads face. Supportive counseling will help you to avoid the danger signals and pitfalls that I overlooked when I began my journey 20 years ago.

While wrapped in the intensely personal feelings that come with divorce, many parents can lose sight of the effects of divorce on their children. Counseling can help you better address the needs of your children by allowing you to see past your own struggles. While it is possible to stop being a spouse/partner, you can never stop being a parent. Your feelings and behaviors will be absorbed by your children and will be directly reflected in their behavior.

It is the rare parent, indeed, who can address their children’s needs while simultaneously embroiled in their own adjustment process. It is your responsibility to face those changes for your own health and the health of your children. But, you don’t have to do it alone.

Richard JaramilloRichard “RJ” Jaramillo, is the Founder of SingleDad.com,
a website and social media resource dedicated to single parenting and specifically for the newly divorced, re-married, widowed and single Father with children.
RJ is self employed, entrepreneur living in San Diego and a father of three children. The mission of SingleDad is to help the community of Single Parents
“Make Life Happen…Again!”

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Richard “RJ” Jaramillo, is the Founder of SingleDad.com, a website and social media resource dedicated to single parenting and specifically for the newly divorced, re-married, widowed and single Father with children. RJ is self employed, entrepreneur living in San Diego and a father of three children. The mission of SingleDad is to help the community of Single Parents “Make Life Happen…Again!”